My Dada Baby

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I wake up to the sound of your voice

Every morning, prepare your feed and

Fall asleep again with your arms

Wrapped around me and your breath

Warm against my cheek.

You open your big round eyes and say,

Amma, I’ll stay with you the whole day,

Please don’t go to work,

Please don’t send me to school today.

My heart pains to part with you

Even if it’s just for a while to school.

When I see your big round eyes swell

With tears and big droplets fall on your cheeks.

But I get to hug you again soon enough

And to hear your sweet voice say

Amma, I’ll stay with you the whole day.

We hug, we laugh, we roll, we eat,

We watch cartoons together,

We play with little cars, your mini coopers,

Your audi, JCB, and aeroplanes and bikes,

And spend the rest of the day leisurely

In each other’s company.

Your expression of love touches me deeply,

And my love for you knows no bounds,

My boy, my Dada Baby, as you call yourself,

You’re the best gift that God has bestowed upon me.

                                                        -elliemeg

Worth Living

Toys strewn floors,

Cars here, cars there,

Little cars everywhere.

Napkins here, chocolates there,

Colouring books, paper planes,

Building blocks, kinder joy toys,

Little crumbs of cookies everywhere.

Smell of lotions, baby powders,

Doraemon on tv, or sometimes Shinchan.

Piled up laundry, piled up books,

Scribbled bedsheets, doodled walls.

Little feet tapping, running here and there,

Sound of laughter echoes everywhere.

Voices calling Amma, all at once.

Pecks of kisses, showering on me

From little lips, now and then.

Little arms hugging me and tugging me,

They make my day- a day worth living,

Everyday.

-elliemeg

My Star (Aski)

A one in a billion star you are-

Yes, you are – my love, my life, my heart,
My reason to live, my guiding light.
Beautiful as the star of Bethlehem
Which blossoms bright in the night.

So tiny were you, held by a single arm,
Smiling away in your dreams.
Love overflowed, my heart felt warm,
While I watched you peacefully sleep,
With tears of joy, memories to keep.

My bundle of joy, my gift from above,
From a tiny, little bud I’ve watched you grow
And blossom into a flower
A more beautiful flower there cannot be
Who walked on this earth so far.

I’ve watched you grow
Into a strong girl that I know,
You’ve softened my heart,
Taught me selfless love,
And the true meaning of love.

You will forever be my brightest star
Who will shine even in the darkest of hour,
And give me strength when I am weak,
And hope, when I am meek-
You- my daughter, you- my life, my star.

My Ray

 

My Ray of light,
The sweetest smile you’ll ever see
Smile that will turn
Your frown into felicity
And sigh into laughter.

My Ray of happiness
My twinkle in the eye,
You’re my warmth in the cold,
Sunshine, on a gloomy day,
My reason to smile and laugh.

My Ray of hope,
You’re my rainbow after the storm,
The reason why I carry on.
Because of you, I know,
There’s still good in the world.

My Ray, I love you so
Nothing compares to the love I have for you.
Even when all have given up on me
I know you’ll always be there for me.
I love you Ray, my son, I live for you.

Blame

I blame the wind
For the pangs of loneliness
Which slowly creeps up my soul
And devours me whole
And takes control of my reason.
I blame the night,
The night that engulfs me
With its impenetrable darkness
So dark, my hands disappear and
My life vanishes in a flicker.

I blame the sun
For letting me see ugly truths
Truths which I always evaded
Or which I overlooked
Inevitable though I knew.

I blame the thunder,
For coming uninvited,
With a terrying countenance
To frighten off the innocent faces-
But it brought me back my senses.

I thank the rains
That trickle down on me,
My eyes and my heart,
Relieving me of my throbbing pain
Washing away the insanity
That enveloped me fully
And tried to swallow me and
Finish me in an undesirable way
That would have put me
In a bad light in the eyes of all.

Now I know the blame is on me,
On me alone and none else.
So take me away
Wallop me, castigate me,
Chastise me, so i can see
All truth vividly,
And mend my ways and make up
For the things I have blundered
And the things I possess
Which makes you vomit
On me and my flesh.

I Die Everyday

IMG_20160526_174521I die everyday with the daily dose of depression that you give.
I die, I die and there’s none to revive me…
Or wipe away the tears that trickle down from the corners of my eyes..
Or to give some hue to my pale blue lips

I walk, I talk, I breathe, I eat but still I do not live
I laugh loud with my friends, sing joyously with my babies,
But deep down I’m writhing in pain…
The pain that causes me to die again and again.

I can’t feel anymore, all my feelings are gone..
Feelings of love, Feelings of excitement, of love…
I’ve forgotten the flutters of the heart,
The butterflies and crunches in the stomach
That comes with eye lock with the one you love..

All these are like a dream and I’ve become oblivious to it
They are far flung feelings that’s now buried deep underneath….

Lost

I have forgotten how it feels like to be loved…

I have forgotten the feel of a soft touch..

Fingers caressing the folds of my skin..

Sensuous kisses travelling from the lips

To the nape of my neck and further below..

The tender look which needed not words

And your eyes which said I was your world…

Yes, I’ve forgotten them all, forgotten how they felt like…

No they are no more there and never more will be..

I have lost you, I have lost your love.
   -elliemeg

Beneath My Wings

I held you in the hollows of my arms

Lifting and supporting you

As you cringed further below

Trying to hide from the eyes

That you once thought adored you.

Insinuating eyes that now follow you

Into every nook and bend

Until you feel cornered

And overpowered by it’s presence.

No the eyes are not there now

But you are overwhelmed with guilt

Which makes you see them everywhere.

My attempts to comfort you are all in vain

Yet I give not up, for you are mine

And mine you’ll always be

I’ll forever protect you

And catch you from falling further.

You are safe beneath my wings.

 

                          –elliemeg

 

Walk on

When you walk through a storm
Hold your head up high
And don’t be afraid of the dark

At the end of a storm
There’s a golden sky
And the sweet silver song of a lark

Walk on through the wind
Walk on through the rain
Though your dreams be tossed and blown

Walk on, walk on
With hope in your heart

 

The poem is not mine. Sharing it cause I loved it

The Reality of Life

Life isn’t a fairy tale,
Where people fall in love
And live happily ever after.
But life is an affliction,
A painful depressant, a bitter pill,
Which all have to swallow-
Brings you wretchedness and engulfs your sanity.

I was young, quite young
Still living in a world of dreams
When suddenly my mind mushroomed
From a world of fairy tales
To a world of realities so corrosive.
Life had given me much
But life took them all away in an instant.

Then again came my prince or so I thought
Who would be my happy place.
But he found greener grass, in reality brown,
Callously he stabbed my heart,
Twisted and turned the knife
Till it bled the life out of me.

Still I waited bleeding red,
Drops of blood oozing out of my heart.
Still he juggled with it,
Till the juggling couldn’t be stopped
And he got trapped in his own artifice
Which became a web,
He couldn’t crawl out of.

Though misled for a while
That transformation was real,
I eventually learnt the hard way
What’s crooked can never be straight.
They say when you want something,
The whole world conspires to get it to you.
But I beg to differ with you Coelho,
What’s not meant to be will never be.